Real form of Upasana 3

The third aspect of Tripada Gayatri is Nistha. Nistha means firm determination, patience, courage, and bravery, devout austerity (tap) and endurance. Just as a pot taken out from potter's kiln is thoroughly examined by thrashing and beating it with fingers to find out whether it is half- baked, broken or fully baked and intact, in the same way, I kept on introspecting and observing myself whether there had been any wavering in my firmness in the face of temptations ad fear. I found that every step was an advance forward and there was no stagnation in the progress.

The brilliance of Savita is known as Brahmavarcas. It is also called ojas, tejas, varcas. It is reflected directly in the form of piety, sharpness and brilliance. The inrush of Savita's light in physical, astral and casual sheaths fills the body with strength, the brain with knowledge and the heart with love and courage's. Later, I started experiencing that my entire self had become a field of started experiencing that my entire self had become a field of light, a column of fire; and divine nectar was flowing through each and every cell of my body, my entire being. I felt, I was getting the joy of contentment, fulfillment and peace, ad if I were drinking Somras (nectar).

This, in brief, is my regular program of doing Upasana for four hours daily. This period effortlessly flies without boredom, tiredness, yawning, as if only half an hour has passed. Every moment I feel heavenly joy and closeness to God. This has become a routine. I have no inclination to count, boast or think of rewards or results. Like all other tasks of daily routine, sitting near God (Upasana) is also a natural living routine for me without which I cannot live for a single day. For me doing Upasana for a fixed period daily is a process of recharging myself with spiritual energies which keep me full of divine bliss throughout t day. I spend every moment blissfully experiencing myself in God and God in me.

In such a state of inner consciousness, one takes the ups and downs of life in one's stride. There is neither joy nor sorrow. An undulating ocean of bliss appears all around.

Wherever I look, I see God. He walks beside me wherever I go. I feel His Presence every moment like a guardian angel, like a pilot. An ocean cannot become a drop but there is no doubt about a drop becoming an ocean by merging its identity in the ocean. An attitude of care-freeness and fearlessness spontaneously grows with the awareness of God's constant presence.

I have cherished firm faith (Srddha) in the Divine throughout my life, which has helped my soul in getting united with God. It is revealing and manifesting itself in the form of actual Bhagvati (Mother aspect of Divinity)